Lady B is out of the house today, having given up on attempting to convince the authoresses that there is nothing at all celebratory about the 4th of July. Indeed, as she left in a cloud of servants and summer trunks, I’m fairly certain I heard the words heathens and death of an Empire.
We did our very best to convince her of the benefits of the 4th…Miranda pulled out her most British of accents as she expounded on the value of a holiday that is, at its core, a reason to drink ale and eat ice cream. No takers.
Tessa gave an impassioned diatribe about fireworks and the way they light up the night sky, which worked very well indeed until Lady B pointed out that in England, they use fireworks to celebrate the defeat of treason, and not the success of it.
Kate started in on why July 4th was particularly valuable for the long weekend…which got us nowhere when Lady B interrupted in a familiar fashion:
And then I opened my big trap, suggesting that it was rather an impressive thing that an entire nation of millions of people somehow find a moment to come together despite all of our many differences and celebrate…well…what’s essentially history.
At which point, Lady B announced that the entire celebration was altogether too premature, as there was still a war on, and if the Colonies knew what was best for them, Mr. Madison would surrender, and we could put this whole unfortunateness behind us. Indeed, If Mr. Madison knew what was best for him, he never would have started this unpleasantness in the first place.
That’s when I discovered that today on The Ballroom Blog, it’s 18-early bits, and she doesn’t know what I know. That is, that everyone on both sides is about to find this whole War of 1812 thing extraordinarily tiresome and decide to put down their cannons and go home.
(Though she did have a point about Mr. Madison (despite her speaking the name with slightly less reverence than perhaps due the 4th president of These United States and, more importantly, husband to Dolley Madison, badass FLOTUS)…I mean, the US technically did start the damn thing. But I refrained from pointing out that we learned our whole empire-building thing by watching you. Even I know when to keep my mouth shut.)
Katharine did mention the Treaty of Ghent, but Lady B was already too far into her tear to care. Indeed, she was done with us.
Which is really fine, as Lauren sweet talked the cook into sausages and apple pie. And I hear that Sabrina is teaching someone in the kitchen the value of the deviled egg. Though don’t ask me where they’re getting paprika in 18–.
Happy 4th! Any big plans for the long week-end?